Growing up I
was extremely shy. I had four older
brothers and sisters and as the youngest of five I didn’t have to talk because
they did all of the talking for me.
Quite frankly, over the years I got really comfortable with it. As I grew into my early adulthood I found
that I was often put in situations where I didn’t have a choice but to come out
of my comfort zone.
Social
settings were my least favorite. You
know when you are in a crowded room and everyone is talking and you feel like
the lone soldier. Well that was me, and
I didn’t quite know how to leap past my inability to just do the small talk that
most people do at parties. What I did
was keep my circles small and put myself in spaces and places where I felt
socially comfortable.
Well, as God
would have it, he wanted me to be hospitable and open to new people so he moved
us down to New Orleans. New Orleans is a
social town and they are very close in their circles but are willing to let you
in, if you open your heart to them. I remember
before I left Virginia to move to New Orleans, I asked my oldest sister Angela how I can be sociable when I
walk into a new environment. Just
a quick note, Angela is verbally and socially gifted. She can literally walk into any room and make
everyone feel as if they have known her for years and vice versa, she is always
the belle of the ball. She gave me the
best advice and said, “Dedra, when you go to a party always act as if you are
the hostess.” Think about it if you are
the hostess you will go up to people, talk to them and get to know them. This was the best advice and when I went to
New Orleans, I took heed to her advice and I made some life time friends, attended the
best parties and yes, in my mind I was the hostess. (smile) It was a great experience.
Over the
years, God started calling me to speak in larger arenas where being shy and
talking to people had to be a thing of the past. I remember one time my mentor, Linda Higgison
invited me to speak at an Event Solutions conference attended by event leaders in our industry. It was my first
time speaking in a public arena. I was
so nervous the night before that I was sick to my stomach. I went to my bible to seek comfort. Well, you know how God gives you what you need when you need it,
I immediately came to the scripture where Moses was speaking to God about not
feeling comfortable in speaking to Pharoah. Moses said to the Lord, “O Lord, I have
never been eloquent, neither in the past nor since you have spoken to your
servant. I am slow of speech and
tongue. The Lord said to him, “Who gave
man his mouth? Who makes him deaf or
mute? Who gives him sight or makes him
blind? Is it not I, the Lord? Now go; I will help you speak and will teach
you what to say. Exodus 4:10-12
That one
scripture was life changing and whenever I am feeling overwhelmed in speaking
in public I go straight to that scripture and I walk boldly in it knowing that
I am a child of God and he has prepared my way and will help and teach me what
to say. Wow, that still comforts my
heart when I read it.
I have found
over the years, when I speak from my heart all goes well. The next time you go to speak, or are in a
situation where you don’t feel comfortable and are nervous, pray to God and ask
for him to speak through you, let it go and enjoy the moment that he has
prepared for you!
